Too bad I can't do that in real life. I suppose I could have run cons on people. I'm smart and I'm a very convincing liar, the few times I have actually manipulated a situation by being untruthful. Usually, I just did it when I wanted to leave work. I was so good at that, I wouldn't even have to lie. My supervisor would take one look at me and insist I go home and take a sick day. As a rule, though, I rarely did it for any other reason, and certainly not to my friends and family. I'm much too empathetic. My concience would have tortured me .Maybe I should have chosen a career as an actress. Oh, well. Too late now.
I seem to be in a dormant stage, as far as making progress goes. My mind has pretty much gone on vacation in a far away place. Guess it needs to kick back and rest awhile. Makes sense. I've hit so many dead-ends in the labyrinth I've been trying to maneuver for the last four years, I've run out of steam. I need to take a break. Obviously I can't take a break from being a paraplegic, though I've accepted the reality of my handicap. But I don't accept that being helpless and dependent has to continue to be my reality. There's still a chance that things can improve and I will not acquiece to accepting that as my reality until there simply is no hope of improvement.
But, while I wait to get evaluated by an orthopedic surgeon to see if one will accept the challenge and risk of performing the surgery I need, I guess I'll take a break from all the anxiety and fear that I'll be stuck this way forever. If they turn me down, then I guess I'll have to cross that bridge, even though I don't really want to.
I'm sleepy. Not enough sleep again. I've lost count of all the typos I've corrected and doubt seriously if I caught them all, so try to ignore those.
Sweet, restful sleep, peeps. May all your days be filled with happiness and contentment.
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