What happened?

You might be wondering that, because it's been over a month since I wrote my last blog entry. Honestly, I'm not entirely sure what happened, but I'll try to figure it out.  First, I got tired of beating my head againts walls and backed way off from trying, futiley, to fight my way out of going nowhere. I didn't give up, exactly, but I did realize that I need to choose my battles more wisely. Once I did, I was much happier. For awhile all I did was watch tv shows and movies, along with a few documentaries, on my iPad. I was kicking back, trying to renew my mental, emotional and spiritual energy. It worked pretty well and that also made me happier.

However, I had some infections going that had me feeling bad and causing me pain. My doctor doesn't like prescribing medicine, especially pain meds and antibiotics.  So, for weeks, I just lay in bed feeling pretty awful. It culminated, eventually, into a severe pain on my left side. I was sent to the emergecy room. They did a ct scan but couldn't see anything so they sent me back to the nursing home. The next day, the pain got worse and worse until my stomach grew distended and hard and I spent the entire night screaming with pain. It wasn't as painful as giving birth, but it was close.

So the next morning I went back to the emergency room. This time they did an x-ray and found the problem. I had a bowel impaction, which meant that nothing was getting through. Think about that for a quick moment. Don't dwell on it, though, because it's an icky mental image.

So they put a tube down my nose and admitted me into the hospital. I was there 8 days.

I won't go into the gritty details of my treatments. They, happily, involved getting intravenous antibiotics, which coincidently cleared up my infections, so yay for that. And I got this dandy IV pain medicine which, when given too quickly, made me throw up, which you do NOT want to do when you have a tube going down your throat. But, at the same time, it gave me a hell of a rush, which sent me back to the '60s. I never actually shot anything up back then, but the rush from my pain med gave me a better understanding of why people get hooked on that kind of thing. And how it can turn into a very steep slippery slope. I even considered lying about my pain to get more, but, thankfully, resisted the urge.

Gradually, day by day, I got better and better. They finally took the tube out of my nose, and my sore throat got better until I could talk again. Not being able to talk -- now, THAT was painful.

The experience was extremely educational and I learned some real spiritual lessons, as well. In fact, I had a true spirtual revelation. Two of them.

This entry is too long to tell you about them today, but I will explain about these revelations in my next entry. I promise not to let 6 weeks go by between entries this time.

Thank you to everyone who gave me love and support while I was sick. You're the best. Love and peace. ❤️